I finally got all my photos pretty much imported into iPhoto in addition to all the music I added to iTunes. So now I only have about 1/2 a gig left of free space. To make room for everything I’ve been going through and trashing a lot of old stuff. I didn’t want to keep these, but I didn’t want to trash them either. From some old email:
These are pretty cool. I need to go out and get some Alka Seltzer for sure.
TIPS FOR A LIFETIME
- Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
- Use a meat baster to “squeeze” your pancake batter onto the hot griddle – perfect shaped pancakes every time.
- To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
- To prevent egg shells from cracking, add a pinch of salt to the water before hard-boiling.
- Run your hands under cold water before pressing Rice Krispies treats in the pan-the marshmallow won’t stick to your fingers.
- To get the most juice out of fresh lemons, bring them to room temperature and roll them under your palm against the kitchen counter before squeezing.
- To easily remove burnt-on food from your skillet, simply add a drop or two of dish soap and enough water to cover bottom of pan, and bring to a boil on stove-top – skillet will be much easier to clean.
- Spray your Tupperware with nonstick cooking spray before pouring in tomato-based sauces – no more stains.
- When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead – no white mess on the outside of the cake.
- If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it’s still cooking, drop in a peeled potato – it absorbs the excess salt for an instant “fix me up”.
- Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator – it will keep for weeks.
- Brush beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
- Place a slice of apple in hardened brown sugar to soften it back up.
- When boiling corn on the cob, add a pinch of sugar to help bring out the corn’s natural sweetness.
- To determine whether an egg is fresh, immerse it in a pan of cool, salted water. If it sinks, it is fresh – if it rises to the surface, throw it away.
- Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
- Don’t throw out all that leftover wine: Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
- If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
- Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. Just slice and rub raw potato on the stains and rinse with water.
- To get rid of itch from mosquito bite: try applying soap on the area, instant relief.
- Ants, ants, ants everywhere … Well, they are said to never cross a chalk line. So get your chalk out and draw a line on the floor or wherever ants tend to march – see for yourself.
- Use air-freshener to clean mirrors: It does a good job and better still, leaves a lovely smell to the shine.
- When you get a splinter, reach for the scotch tape before resorting to tweezers or a needle. Simply put the scotch tape over the splinter, then pull it off. Scotch tape removes most splinters painlessly and easily.
- NOW Look what you can do with Alka-Seltzer:
Clean a toilet – drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets, wait twenty minutes, brush, and flush. The citric acid and effervescent action clean vitreous china.
Clean a vase – to remove a stain from the bottom of a glass vase or cruet, fill with water and drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets.
Polish jewelry – drop two Alka-Seltzer tablets into a glass of water and immerse the jewelry for two minutes.
Clean a thermos bottle – fill the bottle with water, drop in four Alka-Seltzer tablets, and let soak for an hour (or longer, if necessary).
Unclog a drain – clear the sink drain by dropping three Alka-Seltzer tablets down the drain followed by a cup of Heinz White Vinegar Wait a few minutes, then run the hot water.- If your VCR has a year setting on it, which most do, you will not be able to use the programmed recording feature after 12/31/99. Don’t throw it away. Instead, set it for the year 1972 as the days are the same as the year 2000. The manufacturers won’t tell you. They want you to buy a new Y2K VCR.
Prison vs. Work
In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8′ X 10′ cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6′ X 8′ cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere. At work you are just ball-and-chained.
In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required. At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.
In prison you spend most of your life looking through bars from the inside wanting to get out. At work you spend most of your time wanting to get out and inside bars.
In prison you can join many programs which you can leave at any time. At work there are some programs you can never get out of.
In prison there are wardens who are often sadistic. At work we have managers.
