Stolen from one of my cousin’s myspace page:
“Total absence of humor renders life impossible.” Colette
“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.” Albert Einstein
“Laughter is the closest distance between two people.” Victor Borge
I finally got all my photos pretty much imported into iPhoto in addition to all the music I added to iTunes. So now I only have about 1/2 a gig left of free space. To make room for everything I’ve been going through and trashing a lot of old stuff. I didn’t want to keep these, but I didn’t want to trash them either. From some old email:
These are pretty cool. I need to go out and get some Alka Seltzer for sure.
TIPS FOR A LIFETIME
- Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
- Use a meat baster to “squeeze” your pancake batter onto the hot griddle – perfect shaped pancakes every time.
- To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
- To prevent egg shells from cracking, add a pinch of salt to the water before hard-boiling.
- Run your hands under cold water before pressing Rice Krispies treats in the pan-the marshmallow won’t stick to your fingers.
- To get the most juice out of fresh lemons, bring them to room temperature and roll them under your palm against the kitchen counter before squeezing.
- To easily remove burnt-on food from your skillet, simply add a drop or two of dish soap and enough water to cover bottom of pan, and bring to a boil on stove-top – skillet will be much easier to clean.
- Spray your Tupperware with nonstick cooking spray before pouring in tomato-based sauces – no more stains.
- When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead – no white mess on the outside of the cake.
- If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it’s still cooking, drop in a peeled potato – it absorbs the excess salt for an instant “fix me up”.
- Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator – it will keep for weeks.
- Brush beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
- Place a slice of apple in hardened brown sugar to soften it back up.
- When boiling corn on the cob, add a pinch of sugar to help bring out the corn’s natural sweetness.
- To determine whether an egg is fresh, immerse it in a pan of cool, salted water. If it sinks, it is fresh – if it rises to the surface, throw it away.
- Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
- Don’t throw out all that leftover wine: Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
- If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
- Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. Just slice and rub raw potato on the stains and rinse with water.
- To get rid of itch from mosquito bite: try applying soap on the area, instant relief.
- Ants, ants, ants everywhere … Well, they are said to never cross a chalk line. So get your chalk out and draw a line on the floor or wherever ants tend to march – see for yourself.
- Use air-freshener to clean mirrors: It does a good job and better still, leaves a lovely smell to the shine.
- When you get a splinter, reach for the scotch tape before resorting to tweezers or a needle. Simply put the scotch tape over the splinter, then pull it off. Scotch tape removes most splinters painlessly and easily.
- NOW Look what you can do with Alka-Seltzer:
Clean a toilet – drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets, wait twenty minutes, brush, and flush. The citric acid and effervescent action clean vitreous china.
Clean a vase – to remove a stain from the bottom of a glass vase or cruet, fill with water and drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets.
Polish jewelry – drop two Alka-Seltzer tablets into a glass of water and immerse the jewelry for two minutes.
Clean a thermos bottle – fill the bottle with water, drop in four Alka-Seltzer tablets, and let soak for an hour (or longer, if necessary).
Unclog a drain – clear the sink drain by dropping three Alka-Seltzer tablets down the drain followed by a cup of Heinz White Vinegar Wait a few minutes, then run the hot water.- If your VCR has a year setting on it, which most do, you will not be able to use the programmed recording feature after 12/31/99. Don’t throw it away. Instead, set it for the year 1972 as the days are the same as the year 2000. The manufacturers won’t tell you. They want you to buy a new Y2K VCR.
Prison vs. Work
In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8′ X 10′ cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6′ X 8′ cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere. At work you are just ball-and-chained.
In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required. At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.
In prison you spend most of your life looking through bars from the inside wanting to get out. At work you spend most of your time wanting to get out and inside bars.
In prison you can join many programs which you can leave at any time. At work there are some programs you can never get out of.
In prison there are wardens who are often sadistic. At work we have managers.
Happy New Year to all my loved ones and everyone else too! *hugs*
Success
by Bessie Anderson Stanley
He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who has left the world better than he found it, whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem or a rescued soul; who has never lacked appreciation of Earth’s beauty or failed to express it; who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had; whose life was an inspiration; whose memory a benediction.
Geek:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geek
an enthusiast or expert especially in a technological field or activity
Nerd:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerd
Nerd, as a stereotypical or archetypal designation, refers to somebody who passionately pursues intellectual or esoteric interests
They sound pretty similar to me. And I think we both qualify as both. 
Geekiness quiz: http://www.blogthings.com/howgeekyareyouquiz/
I’m:
Academic Geekiness: Moderate
Gamer Geekiness: Moderate
Geekiness in Love: Moderate
Internet Geekiness: Moderate
Music Geekiness: Moderate
Fashion Geekiness: Low
SciFi Geekiness: Low
General Geekiness: None
Movie Geekiness: None
This morning the ducks were all splishing and splashing taking morning baths. I stopped to watch two adorable tree squirrels spiral down around and around a tree trunk chasing each other. And a white heron had found something underwater to stand on and appeared to be magically floating an inch above the water.
I had a doctor’s appointment this morning, so I managed to drop off my rose at the office to enjoy this week. All last night Khalua was crying at the fridge because she saw me hide it in there.
Oh, and I was wondering yesterday where everyone was, the bike path was so empty. Duh! Rainy weather = people wimping out and taking the bus! Hehe.
I just remembered that there was this bit I wanted to share from one of the columns I read. The important part of the whole article:
“Sternberg proposes a triangular theory of love, in which love has three components: intimacy, passion and commitment. You bring some combination of the three together to make the kind of love you want – or don’t want.
Kinds of love:
Perfect – intimacy, passion and commitment
Shallow – passion and commitment
Companionate – intimacy and commitment
Romantic – intimacy and passion
Empty – commitment
Infatuated – passion
Liking – intimacy
Non-love – absence of all three
Before you profess one kind of love, look at how Sternberg defines the three components to see which ones you truly have:
Intimacy – psychological knowledge of each other (and connection based on that)
Passion – erotic attraction
Commitment – the decision that a person loves another person and the commitment to maintain that love. ”
And this came from Tora’s lady’s blog, and I agree! I think it applies to any romantic relationship. I haven’t read The Prophet in ages, it was really good though.
“I’ll just leave you with one of my favorite quotes about marriage. It’s by Kahlil Gibran and is from “The Prophet.” His words speak so very truly about being a complete, individual person. Don’t lose sight of the fact that you are a whole person in and of yourself! You have hobbies and interests and memories and a life outside of your husband, but you share and cherish each other, as two pillars of a temple stand strongly and independently to hold up the “roof” of marriage. To make your marriage stronger, make yourself stronger, and look for ways to strengthen your bonds.
On Marriage
Then Almitra spoke again and said, “And what of Marriage, master?”
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
From Dert”
I found this going through the stickies on my computer:
When you have come to all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.
No clue who said it, but I like it.
I have these across the top of my monitor:
As novices, we think we’re entirely responsible for the way people treat us. I have long since learned that we are responsible only for the way we treat people. – Rose Lane
It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis. – Margaret Bonnano
It is never too late to be what you might have been. – George Eliot
It’s not what you do once in awhile, it’s what you do day in and day out that makes the difference. – Jenny Craig
Worry is a misuse of the imagination. – Audrey Woodhall
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you. – Sister Mary Tricky
Reality is something you rise above. – Liza Minnelli
Strive for excellence, not for perfection. – From one of those holiday popper/cracker things.
Digging through old saved emails I found this one:
Touch Deprivation
Herewith a link to article related to the necessity of touch for health and development.
‘In short, Prescott found that those societies that lavish affectionate touch on their infants and children, and also are tolerant or encouraging of adolescent sexual/affectional behaviors were the least violent societies on Earth; with the converse also being true.’
‘That is, the quality of our relationships throughout our lives is massively effected by the quality of our attachments in infancy and early childhood. And, specific aspects of the communication and touch relationship between child and primary caretakers primarily influence the quality of these early attachments.’
‘It has been discovered that pleasurable touch is associated with enhanced learning, improved IQ, language acquisition, reading achievement, memory, general neonate development, preterm infant development, reduced self-mutilating behavior in the severely mentally
retarded, expanded external awareness of autistic patients, improved geriatric health,
decreased childhood clinginess and fears of exploring their environment, the elimination inappropriate self-stimulation and public masturbation behavior in children, and improved visual-spatial problem solving…’
‘In its most rigid and fundamentalist form, the Judeo-Christian philosophy is staunchly anti-touch, anti-body, anti-pleasure, and anti-sexual. To our not so distant ancestors the formula “Touch=Sex=Sin” was a bromide to live by.’
‘One of the outcomes of prolonged touch deprivation and the resulting neurological deterioration, is a hypersensitivity to touch.’
This list, and more can be found at:
http://www.xmission.com/~emailbox/humor.htm
Make the world your playground.
Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up. Dragging a sock over it helps.
If you can’t get your way, lay across the keyboard till you do.
When you are hungry, meow loudly so they feed you just to shut you up.
Always find a good patch of sun to nap in.
Nap often.
When in trouble, just purr and look cute.
Life is hard, and then you nap.
Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.
When in doubt, cop an attitude.
Variety is the spice of life. One day, ignore people; the next day, annoy them.
Climb your way to the top, that’s why the curtains are there.
Make your mark in the world, or at least spray in each corner.
Always give generously; a bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, “I care”.
Which is why I’m moving. From Princess SP’s blog from some Wallstreet thingy:
“As Frank notes, commuting through congestion is miserable for most of us, whether we’ve been doing it for four months or 40 years, and an assortment of studies shows that commutes (even as short as 15 minutes a day) can have serious and measurable effects on health.”
From: http://www.creators.com/lifestyle_show.cfm?columnsName=ama
Winners don’t say bad things about people, but losers do. Criticizing other people makes losers feel better about themselves. Winners like to make you smile, but losers love to make others sad or angry.