How do I make a choice? I identify the choices and pick one.
I choose to trust my self.
My self built a system.
Dec 18 Log: The system brought me back here, so the system says I need to document my choices and then pick one.
What were my choices? Use the system or not.
Dec 16 Log:
Every moment is a chance to make a choice.
Making choices takes practice. If we stop making choices, we stop living as humans and merely exist as animals running purely on habit.
I like Winnifred’s original version better:
Father, give us courage to change what must be altered, serenity to accept what cannot be helped, and the insight to know the one from the other.Serenity Prayer – Wikipedia
I would update it to say:
I can choose to act with bravery to change my understanding of myself, to accept with serenity that which I cannot change and the curiosity to drive the pursuit of knowledge to distinguish the two from each other.
Bravery is choosing to take action that you believe is right, rather than choosing to let fear control you.
If you don’t like any of your choices – it’s time to ask if those are really your choices. And if they are, then it’s time to slow down and back up – why are these your choices right now?
Right now I’m choosing to document my choices, so that the next time I end up with a choice I don’t like, I can trace back to the point of failure in the system and try a different choice.
Just now I chose to clean up after my child. I have already identified the problem – let’s see how far I can follow this thread before I decide another one is more important:
The problem is me. I have not taught my child how to clean up when finishing a task. Why?
I have not mastered that skill yet. Why? I have not practiced it enough. Why? Because I only realized recently that it was an important skill. Why? Because anything worth doing is worth doing well. Why? 1 To do something well I need to understand what I’m doing. Why? If I don’t understand what I’m doing, I might do more harm than good. (Road to hell)
Either I have the motivation to do something, or I have a system to help me do it. – Stub, had to stop here for self care. Dec. 17 7:45p
Log of prior answers before editing:
1 Because if I don’t have the motivation to do it well, I should be figuring out why, not doing it anyway. Why? If I don’t have the motivation, that’s a problem with my system. Why? If I understand myself. Why did I not? Because my parents didn’t teach me.
Coming from a place of pain, fear, confusion and darkness, where it feels like I’m trapped in a cage made of funhouse mirrors that distort every bit of in
Brain dump to help make choices:
Things pulling my attention:
Testing the spaceship game
testing the cat treat dispenser
cleaning up the living room to remove distractions
documenting the system so that the system can work – if it’s worth doing, it’s worth documenting.
It’s 1:37, I have a body double available until 3.
Using the system and documenting the parts that aren’t yet and self care are the highest priorities.
First transition check.
Then use a time timer and headphones.